Mindfulness, meditation and me.
Before my diagnosis I had started doing a bit of meditation and mindfulness. But I wasn’t really motivated or invested in doing it regularly. I found it hard to concentrate on sitting or lying still with thoughts coming and going and I was easily distracted.
However, I made a conscious effort to stick with it and like muscles, which get stronger the more you use them, meditating became easier too. When I got my diagnosis on 28th May 2024 I felt many emotions, shock, fear, uncertainty, and many more. Practising meditation every day really helped me to control my worries and sit with my anxieties, but it has taken a lot of practice.
Meditation can be practised in many ways, sometimes I like to sit in silence and other times I like to use my apps on my phone, Headspace and Balance,. These apps guide you through different meditations, such as body scans or breath focus. The goal is not to stop thoughts from happening, as this is impossible. But to let thoughts in and let them pass without attaching much thought or feeling to them. I like to visualise a stream with leaves floating down it, I put thoughts on a leaf and let them carry on down the stream.
I have been meditating regularly for a year now and do it most days, sometimes twice a day. If I don’t do it, I notice and miss it. It has become a routine that really helps to ground me and keep my emotions and thoughts in check. It’s a brilliant way to reconnect with myself and to slow down. We all have busy lives, but it feels good to break away from it sometimes to sit and breathe.
If meditation seems a step too far then practising mindfulness in every day life can be a great start. When walking, notice the trees, flowers, birds singing. Trying to engage all my senses with what I see, hear, smell, feel when I walk is becoming habitual. I walked home from work yesterday and almost every person who walked past me was on their phone. I find it sad that so many people don’t look up anymore. They don’t make eye contact or say hello or connect with their surroundings. Surroundings are so beautiful at this time of the year. Daffodils are popping up, lambs are starting to voice their high-pitched bleats, snowdrops are growing. Today, the sky is blue, and the sun is shining and making beautiful colours in the trees.
I did a short mediation with a client this morning, who suffers from anxiety. We sat on our mats (she lay down) after stretching, next to the daffodils, listening to the birds singing. We just did 8 minutes of guided mediation from my Headspace app. It felt amazing and she really enjoyed it. It made me happy to share this with someone who I think would get a lot of benefit from it. I really I think all of us benefit from it. If you haven’t tried it I can hugely recommend it and stick at it if you feel it isn’t for you. It has made a big difference to how I have coped with last year’s difficulties and getting back to being myself this year.
